Tuesday, December 13, 2011

It's gonna be a long Winter

Well, here we are, right smack dab in the middle of weight gain season.  

Actually, the "weight gain season" officially starts with all that Halloween candy that gets casually grazed upon during that one night of the year that we teach our children that it’s ok to dress up and go pan-handling.  

With that in mind, I’d like to make an observation on Halloween.  Have you ever noticed that the later it gets, the older the kids get and the more the costumes look like regular street clothes? 

I’ve noticed and it ticks me off…  

I usually save my Sonic Burger Peppermints for the street clothes people.  I have a friend who saves all his old Whataburger ketchup packages to give to them.  I’ve thought about that myself, but I’m afraid I’ll end up with smushed Whataburger ketchup packages all over my front porch.   Anyway, I digress…

The leftover Halloween candy (if there is any) slowly undermines any hope of weight loss for the first few weeks of November, then there’s Thanksgiving and the endless grazing from Thursday through the weekend, with all the leftover Thanksgiving feast, not to mention all the football food.

Do I even need to mention December?...

It’s not just the Christmas Dinner that gets us (as with Thanksgiving), but for one solid month, there’s an endless parade of Christmas goodies like cookies, sweets, cheeses, sausage balls and all kinds of little Christmas snacks that are at the office or are delivered to your home or are just under your nose wherever you go. 

Let’s face it…   For such a wonderfully spiritual time of the year, it’s just one long temptation after another…   Praise the Lord and have a Chocolate Bourbon Ball!...

After Christmas, there’s still tons of food left to get through the New Year’s celebration, then we have the College Bowl Games…  Everybody knows you can’t watch College Bowl Games without at least 2 gallons of Rotel Cheese Dip (with sausage or hamburger included) and a number of varieties of Chips.

After all the Bowl Games, you would think we would have had enough football, but no… 

By early January, we’re fully into the NFL Playoffs, so more football watching parties and more Rotel Cheese Dip and chips, not to mention, Spicy Chicken Wings and Chili.  (If you’re lucky, you know someone like me who has a killer Chili recipe).  I have found that a good spicy Chili is a welcomed addition to any party where there’s Rotel Cheese Dip just to act as a stool softener after all that cheese.

NFL Playoffs go right up to the first weekend in February, culminating with Super Bowl Sunday…

What a Schmorgesbord Super Bowl Sunday is…

I once read that there are more avocados bought for Super Bowl Sunday than any other day of the year…   That’s a lot of Guacamole!...

Finally, we move from a cheesy, salty snack induced euphoria that is about 5 weeks of straight football food, to Valentine’s Day.  That one holiday of the year, manufactured by women, for women, that most men don’t particularly care for because we’re still trying to make a dent in the credit card (from Christmas) and all of a sudden, here’s another National Holiday that says we have to go out and buy something else. 

Fortunately for me, my wife is happy with a card, a box of chocolates (that I usually eat half of) and a fine dinner.  And there you go, one last fling with excessive caloric intake, and then we get a break before all the Easter Candy, Fried Chicken and Deviled Eggs. 

And if you’ve read this blog, you know how I feel about deviled eggs…

Copyright © 2011 Denning Key